So another big R talk at lunch today. So frustrated and just need to get this out. He talks about how no one understands how he feels, yet it sounds like he really just wants someone to tell him that he should pursue OW. For six weeks I listened to so much from him, how much he loves me, how he would do anything for me, just wants me and the kids close to him and to start our lives over, and while I take responsibility for my decision to move away to be with him, I am still pissed that we have been living together for a measly two weeks and he is already back on the fence. I told him to today that I am here, I will not uproot my kids again to move back home if we don't work out, and now i feel that all I can do is detach from him and start rebuilding my life on my own, without his consideration. Of course he gets all "what do you mean by that.." He doesn't get how close I am to telling him to **** off. Yes, I am rambling, I know, just need to get this out! Maybe peicing is not where I should be, maybe I need to move over to infidelity.
Again, his selfishness amazes me. One day he knows we have a lot to work through and is totally ready to do it, the next he doesn't know if he wants to be with me, regardless of OW. I wish and want for so much, and so many times I FELT that we were on that path, I think now the only answer is to fight for him by leaving him be.
