Your husband getting upset when you don't do things his way is immature and controlling. Of course, don't tell him that..you can't.
I remember times when the pain of my M was so hard that sometimes I had to sleep on the couch. A few days here and there. But my kids never knew! Or if they did find me there on a SAturday I'd say I couldn't sleep..which was the truth.
All that to say, you sleeping on the couch and your S5 sleeping in bed with your H....VERY bad training. It is unaccpetable.
I know you don't have any control over this.
What has your H said about this? He surely knows that he is modeling a weird thing to your son.
An amazing motivator has been...do I want my kids to go through a difficult M? Then I gotta change...I have to work it out....to show them how to have a good marriage.
Try that one on your H. Kids will do what they see done. Even kids who are abused will seek out abusive relationships becausae they are familiar with it.
Ask you H...do you want your son to have a marriage like this? He will...unless we show him something different. Let's go to counseling!
Someone once said that the greatest gift you can give your kids is a loving marriage. Why? Not just the security...but to show them they can and how to have one! Your son will do the same thing to his wife that he sees his dad do to you...unless something changes.
That was a huge motivator for me to change. It was one of them.
