First let me say I totally understand the wanting another baby and how the enjoyment with each child grows. I myself wanted another baby but recently gave up on the thought due to my age. Like Balto I will be having grandkids in the near future I think lol. Not really sure I understand that AS because I thought I remembered two recent miscarriages. Which indicates you can get pregnant just have a problem carrying and I am not aware that AS can change that factor. But I am not aware of alot in life lol. I wish you well at any rate.
I love the banter your H and you passed on about your azz and so forth. I feel this kind of banter is awesome in a relationship. Hopefully it will become a normal thing between the two of you.
This comment of yours jumped out at me.
I do love him so. Of course, I just love him best naked and sweaty - is that so wrong?
I think that this would be a perfect thing to say to your H. It is not only fun sexy flirty it is also a compliment to his manhood and LM abilities. A giant pump to his ego. Of course the guys around here may disagree. I just know that if I said something of this sort to my H it would be on and he would be strutting around like king [censored]!
Sorry your vacation was not all that you had hoped for. Maybe your get away will be better. I like your H would be more intent on keeping a eye on the kids then on my H. But my kids have a way to find trouble no matter where they go. If out on a boat and someone yelled man over board with no doubt I would know it was one of mine having jumped in to dance with a dolphin or something of the like. The only way I could half relax and notice my H is to not take my kids with me Vacations are to much hard work with them lol.
I don't actually have a problem carrying per se - more likely, poor egg quality due to age and H's low sperm morphology has been the cause of not getting preggie in the last six cycles. Thus, it seems, we need help. The IUI would allow the good sperm to be separated from the bad, the clomid will increase the egg quality. Miscarriage is still a factor if there is a genetic issue. Genetic issues are, of course, more likely as we age. We are ok with that. We are grandparents four times over and it is fun.
I used to say fun flirty stuff like that to my H regularly and then I got frustrated with it because so many times he just didn't rspond at all or didn't respond in kind. Mostly, he will smile an embarrassed smile. Now I think we are in a place where I can start doing more of that sort of thing again.
Overall, I am feeling more positive about the quality of our interactions. It is not always easy and I do get frustrated with the preemptive strike but I will keep working on things. I am currently reading a new book which I plan to discuss on this thread soon. It looks at the nature of grievance of relationship from a Bhuddist perspective.
"I used to say fun flirty stuff like that to my H regularly and then I got frustrated with it because so many times he just didn't rspond at all or didn't respond in kind. Mostly, he will smile an embarrassed smile."
Big ditto. I need a course in how to get my W to talk dirty to me.
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
Thanks for explaining that. I totally understand what you are saying now. My brother in law suffers from low sperm count and weak sperm. His wife and himself did the sperm wash and so forth and AS it was not enough for them and after several months ended up going invetro. But my brother in law had really weak sperm and was informed from the get go the AS had a very low possiblility to work. But they have a set of 7 year old twins and a 1 year old singleton now so it seems to have been worth all they went through. I use to feel bad as I chucked baby after baby out so effortlessly and they had so many problems. Oddly my H is the only person amoung his siblings that does not have some form of reproduction problems H had a V reversed and only one side took yet still has a higher sperm count then the average male. I on the other hand have major issues carrying a baby do to a tilted uterus. So it all evens out.
I hope you and your H have great luck with this. I think you are awesome people with all the kids and helping out and still have the desire to want more. I use to do foster care and I know that is not a easy road to travel.
Mostly, he will smile an embarrassed smile
Belive it or not with as vocal and upfront as I can be my ex could elicit this same response from me. He would say something small and it would make me blush and act all shy. But on the inside it made me feel wonderful and adored. And my response other then a smile would just be the word really or hmmm. So maybe this is not a bad response or lack of response as you precieve it to be.
Overall, I am feeling more positive about the quality of our interactions
I think if you can find quality in your interactions that is a good sign.
Yeah - I feel sorry for myself about that way too much. Truth be told, when I am fun and flirty I may not get much immediate reaction but over a few days or so the mood seems lighter and better and eventually we are better synch too. Sometimes my ego gets in the way of allowing me to do this.
Last night we ML and neither of us were very into it. It started off fine and then the connection kinda broke down, H had a hard time coming and I did too. Conception sex - what a good time. The unfortunate thing is that my temp still didn't rise (and it should have today) so we really ought to go at it tonight too. I'm ok if we do or if we don't. We can't always cover the fertile window perfectly.
H's count is ok but the quality isn't great. The thing is that I have been so darn fertile all my life I feel guilty going to the doc for help. All three of my babies were conceived so easily. At my age, having trouble of this sort is normal and yet I have gotten preggo several times - just none viable. With all of this recent stuff I found out for the first time that my uterus is slightly tilted. Cracked me up. I didn't know that when I conceived the first three babies instantly and had dream pregnancies. Anyway, we are going to get a little medical help and let God deal with the rest.
On the compliments I get confused because I can deal with the little smile reaction. Other times it is an almost annooyed reaction and that one stops me cold.
We are interacting well and I am hanging on to that.
Just wanted to tell you I am thinking of you regarding the conceptions sitch. I was on Clomid to conceive, the ovulation tests, the tracking , temp, etc...it's no fun. It takes a strong person to endure it all.
I wish you and H much luck!
Nicky
"There are two types of people -- those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am,' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'"
Frederick Collins
Thanks - having never had these problems I have a new appreciation for those who do. I will be starting the fertility drugs in a couple of weeks if we aren't preggo this cycle. We have our injection class next week. Blech!
Ouch, injections?? I took an oral version of clomid. I am sorry to hear that you'll have to do the injections. I had what I would call an easy time of getting preg for having "fertility issues". It only took four months. I feel really guilty sometimes because it happened so fast for us.
I would have to agree with you though, it's definitely not in our hands. "If it's meant to be..."
Nicky
"There are two types of people -- those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am,' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'"
Frederick Collins
Well all - no sex of any kind last night conception or otherwise. Instead, my H chose not to share that he was in pain because a friend of his who is having a MLC decided to unload on my H - told him everything that was wrong with H in his view. This is a good friend of over twenty years. Anyway, H didn't tell me that he had this conversation (one of several of that kind in the last month with this man) and that it represented probably the final conversation and the end of the friendship.
Instead, he grabs my hand as I start to touch him while we are on the couch watching tv and says "don't I'm too tired for that." He says, that I can hold his hand or something but "don't go near any erogenous zones (I had been about to run my hand over his chest)." Then he turned his back on me when we went to bed.
This am I called him on that behavior on a voice mail. He then told me about the deal with his friend and said that he understands that I have a "nervous habit" of wanting to touch him but that when I do I need to just hold his hand or otherwise keep my hand still. He was angry with me for encouraging him to try to talk with this guy when we spoke about the sitch on Sunday. Drew the line in the sand about leaving him to make decisions about friends he had before we married.
Folks I am beyond pissed. For one, in the emotional state he was in with the friend thing I couldn't win last night if I had stood on my head while balancing his favorite snack on a tray on my feet. I told him so (not that way) in yet another voice mail and I told him that my wanting to touch him was in no way a nervous tic but rather, it was expressive of my love for him. I also told him that when he didn't tell me about his friend it set me up to do something that he wouldn't like.
The great part is that for some stupid reason my body is ovulating late and we "should" have sex tonight. I honestly don't think I can. We are not only not on the same page but aren't in the same stratosphere.
