H - Eat your Oatmeal cookie

[Stigmata]

Yeah, it didn't turn me on either but unfortunately just served to highlight the sitch that I am in - I got compliments from regular to hey baby to rather outlandish from complete strangers whom I could give a sh!t about but can't seem to inspire the same in my husband, whom I love and want to be complimented by. If my H said it, it might turn me on rather than inspiring the "Aaaaaaaaw, how cute response."

H doesn't compliment you?

Your answer:. From earlier post

She has this dreamy, orgasmic look on her face whenever she is with him. Anyway,
H says, "I wish I could make a woman look like that, preferably Karen."

- No, not a classic, traditional compliment. But one in the same. And a big one IMO. Will explain in a bit...

Well, how could he if he doesn't even try? The alien was, of course, a master of
seduction...he knew what to say, what to do, how to look in her eyes, touch her until she was "quivering with desire" (a nod to the bodice ripper books
we women love).

-Another direct answer. Next time use this first sentence on him directly right after he says the "wish" comment. Or perhaps a condensed version of something like the following

"Well he [horny alien mack daddy] can do that because he gets a lot of practice. So you’ve got a lot of catching up to do, hot Earth man. You can be my personal alien sex fiend anytime. And even if you don’t think I look like those women I feel that way on the inside. You’ve got skills, baby. So use them on me before you lose them.”
[sidebar: All Ms please take notice of Karen's "he knew what to do" and bodice ripping comments. Beat it into your heads if you have to.]

Is all of this issue in this M that H sees himself as inept? Could that explain what happens here? What do I do with that?

No, he’s not saying he’s inept. Too strong. What you do with that--Back to H’s “compliment.” (yes, that’s what it was)


"I wish I could make a woman look like that, preferably Karen."

- Let me M translate or “Manslate LOL

“When I’m with my hot W sometimes I feel like a Corvette mechanic looking at an Ferrari. I have skills but I’m not sure she’s getting what she wants out of me.” (sorta like GEL’s H’s jet analogy)

Believe me, Karen, H is well aware he is with someone who draws compliments even if it doesn’t appear that way. And the reason this is such an high compliment from him is that he opened himself up, dropped his “me man” defenses, and vocalized an insecurity. He was actually fishing for you to reassure him via boosting his ego about his insecurity.

As I said, next time jump on a comment like that with what you wrote here (ie, why don’t you try? Or the example of the smut novels )

or amp up his ego with something similar to what I suggested to say back to him.

-Stigmata-

PS. LOL on the Sesame Street actor comment on the “bathtub of rainbows” comment, Mojo. Karen, when I read that I was actually picturing it coming from an young M inside a big purple dinosaur suit, preceded with a lot of )paw? Hand? Claw?) to his own cheeks grasping and a lot of “Gaaawwwrrrsh!s)

Then walking away singing that song that used to drive me insane (I have a lot of nieces).

“I wish all the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops.

Oh what a rain that would be;

Standing outside with my mouth open wide,

Ahh-ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-ah-ahhh.” LOL