I get exactly EVERYTHING you are saying... 'cept I left behind my LDness the same way... kind of in reverse order.... I was tired of being a non-sexual person, avoiding my own sexuality, fearing it...
I didn't want to be LD... didn't want to be HD, either... for all the reasons you have talked about... I just went about it in a similar manner... am I a sexual person? What does that feel like to me? What do I like? What don't I like? Can I be sexually responsive even if I don't feel up to it mentally/emotionally?
It wasn't something I became determined to TRANSFORM myself into... I just wanted to try these things and see how I responded, how I felt, what it would be like... and in the beginning... I had to do mental reminders like you.... but I did it for no one other than me...
<nod> I get EXACTLY what you are saying... and in this approach, there ISN'T anything to worry about (will it go away, will it be enough, will it not be enough)... because the other person has NOTHING to do with your personal exploration and discovery.... not that they become non-human or not important... it's just that they are no longer in any way responsible for my fulfillment or lack of it....
