That is a remarkably accurate analysis. I guess I keep hoping against hope that one day H would decide/learn to push past times when he is anxious or stressed. That one day he would be so bowled over by my loveliness/sexiness that he would not only push past anxiety/stress but come actively seeking raw, agressive sex (without any prior indication of interest from me). Or even (gasp, horrors) come to me and say "God, I'm stressed and I don't want sex but I would love to make you squirm all over, grab the bedsheets and scream for mercy so I'm going to lick you all over until that happens." It is silly, fruitless, a cheeseless tunnel and likely, sinmply not who H is.
And yes, I am already on that hamster wheel of keeping/making H "happy" to maximize chances for closeness - both sexual and non. And yes, whenever I express my unhappiness that we aren't having more sex it prolongs/complicates the no sex phase.
Lately, I have done better with more acceptance and more GAL activities and lately, we have been having more sex.
So, I take it, Mojo, that you credit your shift in philosophy with making you happier in your sl and likely, happier in general. I feel as if I can shift the philopsophy and then I will just become more philosophical about not being happy.
