I wish I knew how to pull quotes.... anyway I do have a plan, I have from day 1 - That is to save my marriage!!! Friends, family and others here tell me to throw the bastard out. They do not have to live my life, only I do. I still have a little bit of hope.
Obviously if I start getting angry and feeling sorry for myself it doesn't get me to my goal. My H has been doing little things, like writing me notes every morning before he leaves for work. We used to do this every day for 12 years, then when the A started the notes stopped. Now they are starting again - baby step? I think so. The other day he asked me to help him move his weight bench, I tried to pick up a 250 lb. bar and he stopped me by saying "that is really heavy, HONEY" - was honey a slip of the tongue? probably, but it sure felt nice to hear words of endearment. He has started doing things around the house again and taking an interest in things, baby step? I think so. Therefore, I will stop going down cheeseless tunnels. I will not ask him to reconsider working on our R. I will work on it on my own and maybe he will soften long enough to realize what he has. I will also work on my self-esteem, I will not play the role of victim any longer.
Anyway, thanks so much to all of you for your constant support and words of encouragement. Will keep you posted on my progress.
