Grasshopper, you are truly a wise man who clearly loves his wife. When she comes to her senses I hope she realizes what a wonderful person she is married to.
You hit the nail on the head when you stated not to react to your emotions. I do this all the time. When I found the receipt I immediately told him to leave, I didn't tell him what I found so he didn't know where that came from. I really don't want him to leave I was just reacting to my anger. I was hoping that he would apologize and take me in his arms and tell me everything is going to be allright. Well, that only happens on TV.
Therefore, if I have no expectations then I will have no disappointments. I will try to keep my emotions under control. I wear a rubberband around my wrist and when I feel my anger rise I snap it - hard.
H came home last night at 7:00 very drunk. I was pleasant towards him, didn't question him and gave him dinner. I'm thinking that if he was with OW they must not have a very good relationship if they get totally plastered together. Who knows. I shouldn't assume anything because unless I hire a private investigator I really don't know what is going on.
I look forward to your infinite wisdom and advise. It helps more than you know. Happy St. Paddy's Day to you too!
