I have the book Love Must Be Tough, I have told my H on several occasions that he must leave. He doesn't. As of this week, I am trying to be better than HER. I do loving things for him without expecting anything in return. I want him to see that the grass is not greener. I don't know, I guess I am weak. I love him and our life and family so much that I don't want to disrupt it. It is not in my nature to be mean. I have done a partial 180 in the fact that I don't question him or ask where he's been or who is is with etc. I act as if I don't care anymore, that I am perfectly happy as I am.
Unfortunately, our finances are such that it would be impossible for either one of us to leave. We should be on Oprah - have you seen the Debt Diet she has going. Anyway, we are both sort of trapped in this situation. I want to make the best of it, my H does not. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. I realize that peoples feelings change. But I also think that if he was so unhappy that he should have clued me in, I am not a mind reader, especially when he always acted like everything was fine. I believe that he is being immature and selfish. Only caring about himself. But that could be the I'm right, your wrong dilema. I don't know...what I do know is this sucks! I could not wish this on my worst enemy. If it were not for my children I really couldn't tell you where I would be. Well...yes I could, probably ten feet under. I have a lot of issues from my childhood and my previous marriage that this has truely pushed me to my limits. But I am a survivor, therefore in the face of everyone (my family and friends who know my situation) I am willing to stick it out. I love this man. End of story.
