GH and NM, Thank you both for responding to me. GH I too am sorry to see you still here. I personally feel you have grown so much since your first post where you were lost and confused. You now have knowledge and purpose and are truely an inspiration to me.
NM, thanks for the tough love. I have reread DR so many times that pages are falling out. I know everything that I need to do it is just hard for me to actually do it. I guess it is my wounded ego. How can this happen to me? My ex-H was the great american playboy, fooled around with tons of people behind my back. One I the reasons I married my current H is that I was sure he would never do something like that to me. Oh well...... Anyway, she is not the problem just part of it. I am thinking of it as a competition - she is obvioulsly very happy when she is around him so I am trying to be even happier. Actually, I try not to think of her and him at all cause that is when I really get into a funk. I do not work outside of our home (although I babysit for extra $) but I think if I were to get a job, even 1 night a week it would do so much for my self-esteem. I need to feel good about myself. I have lost over 20 lbs. on this "DB Diet" and for the first time in years feel good about my body. Too bad I have no one to share it with - enough of the pity party... I will now go find PArob's tread as GH suggested and look for some guidance. Thanks all for the support!
