Should you apologize!!!!??? What for man? YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. What your W did was absolutely out of line and abusive....and I'm sorry to say this, but this will not get better Bube, it's very likely to get worse from here on out.
She's gotten physical with your daughter....protect her. Of course I won't condon what your daughter did with the dog at all, but nothing your daughter did deserved the treatment she received from her mother. Your W's treatment of your daughter obviously upset her enough to wretch in the bathroom....do you really want your D's living with that type of anxiety and anger?
Your W threatened to leave by the weekend.....let her. Offer to help her pack. I completely agree with your counselors advice on this Bube! Don't even worry about what she's telling other people, you and your daughters know the truth of the matter. Don't start apologizing to her for things you didn't do.
I know this is tough for you....but IMPO, if she's threatening to leave don't stop her, don't try to stop her. Her Narcissistic personality is looking for her to be the center of your world and beg her to stay....regardless of her actions. IOW she can do anything she wants....and get away with it....do you really want that?
