Thanks for the link OT. I read a bit and have a question, one that is central to my R problems.
As I have said, I have been, and continue to be gone quite a bit between day job work and my outside photography work. Because of this, my W has always had tons of "me time" to be alone, whatever. She also had, for the last year, she's had all day free from kids, etc. Now please, don't jump on me for that. She tells me herself that she has tons of free time and such so that's not just me speculating what she may or may not do in the days. Actually, a lot of our problems are centered around her wanting me home more often and more than that, "around" more when I was home instead of being in another room, etc. Now she gets to this point where she wants "me time" durring all this that is going on and such but STILL she gets upset or unhappy when I have to go work in the evenings or weekends. WTH? So it's not just having space and freedom, it's WHEN she has the freedom that matters. And it's important that I have a life, but only when SHE is ok with me being gone? Is this normal or is my W possibly as controlling as I am? It's what I have never understood. If she was gone as much as I used to be, I would want nothing more than to spend time with her. She seems to just get resentful and like I am somehow interrupting her life if I ask her to spend time with me when I am home. It's really hard to figure out. Is it that I didn't put her first and ditch some of my "life" in favor of her when SHE asked me to? I ask all this because it's the pattern I see most likely to repeat as I get busy with wedding season.
