Yes, the playful teasing and banter is subjective. Some people just can't stand tickling. Perhaps something else, like foot rubs etc. If she doesn't like to feel pleasure from foot rubs, scalp massagess, hand massages etc. then I don't know what else to say. Blinking cursor.
But my wife dispises that part. "I don't like it, it makes me uncomfortable. If you need it, just verbally tell me you want it, if it is possible for me, I'll try my best to go along, but just get it over with as soon as you can. I know it is my duty as a wife to allow you to have intercourse, but just repect my dislikes for it and get it over with as quickly as you can." Then she removes just the essentially clothing and and says "ok, let's go. Stop trying to make it all extended and dramatic. Just get it done"
<Mouth Agape>
- This is beyond not only my F experience and scope but my comprehension. Trail ends here with me. Dead end into side of mountain.
This is a partnership. Imagine starting a business with another partner. He comes in the first week of the big opening. "Look, I know you want me to come in to work every day for 8 hours or more; so I'm here. Let's just get this stuff over with. I don't enjoy what we're doing but I'll do my part since I am your partner after all."
Can you imagine?? Especially following the first day of your agreement--when you both were so excited about it? Well, it's basically the same thing. Your M is a partnership and your W is being...wel...
I think it was a Shakespeare line to an F: "Get thee to a nunnery."
"Get she to an psychiatrist or psychologist," HG.
She's projecting hostility and is disrespecting you and your R in the process. I can only imagine what tone her inner self-talk is projecting. I know you love her, HG. But she can't love you in return until she finds a way to love herself.
This is the kind of negative energy that, if she allows it to continue within her, is going to cause a lot of stress-related illnesses for her, including cancer.
The whole thing just makes me go "iiiiick". This is SOOOO not what it is supposed to be.
- Ick for sure. Understatement. No, not what an M/R is supposed to be. Antithesis behavior. Hell, this isn't even normal behavior for an reclusive shut in, let alone someone with an partner.
She needs professional help. Get what's internally eating away at her out of her by hook or crook; by counseling/therapy and medication if necessary until she can return to the F she resembled when you first asked for her hand.
Hang in there HG. It's normal to feel your feelings slip under an full-on Love Busting assault of your Love Bank account like this from her. If you didn't, I wouldn't think you were human. Your subconscious and concept of self-worth are trying to protect you this way. The slipping feeling is an protective defense mechanism preventing you from feeling like you have zero worth to OP.
It's not you. It's her. Just always keep telling yourself that, friend. Be determined to have a happy life no matter what the outcome. You aren't responsible for her negativity, only for countering it with your own positivity. Her self-talk you can't control. Yours you can.
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
