Feeling Alone in my marriage

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Thank you for the support, I am really down and need it right now. I feel like I am going through this all over again. I just don't understand him and he won't let me. That is the most frustrating to me. I feel all alone and I hate that. I am starting into my old ways again--not eating, exercising and being a clean freak. Mostly it all keeps me occupied to try not to constantly think about my situation. For dinner I had a clementine and 4 baby carrot sticks. I lost over 20 lbs when he left but gained it all back and then some, so I need to lose it anyway.
Today he acted like nothing was up. I just didn't say anything. My daughter repeated to my H something she said to me about what if I married the neighbor. He laughed. I commented that Daddy wouldn't care and he said nice bust. But he really wouldn't I feel. Is it so much to ask to be loved? I love him but don't like him very much right now. These usually are the only times he will talk to me, when I am giving him the silent treatment. I am very good at feeling sorry for myself. I say its from practice. I still have my meds but really don't want to go back on them. But I may have to again. I have two kids I must still be there for. It isn't just about me anymore. Thanks for listening.