So glad your talk went so well. It is wonderful H is going with you to the C. I hope your session goes well.
The biggest thing that I got out of our talk last night was that the only thing in our R that he is unhappy about is that I am unhappy
That sounds like what my H says most of the time. Odd how it works that way. H never realized we had problems in our marriage until I wanted to leave two years ago. I could never figure out and still cannot how one person can be falling apart and the other be in happy camper land in the same relationship. But then I cannot understand how one person can get EC from sex when the other person does not either. Logic would say it takes two to create that connection. But heck I don't think relationships follow the laws of logic lol.
I guess it all boils down to what makes us happy as individuals and what we need in a relationship as individuals. Like you said you long for romance I guess if romance is not as important to your H as stablity then he could feel your relationship has that and is content while you feel your relationship lacks because romance is important to you. And you feel that the relationship lacks romance leaving you discontent. ah the mysteries of relationships.
I guess I am so into pleasing people that I fear that if my feelings displease someone, they will not like/love me anymore
I think this goes along the lines of exceptance Nicky, Sorta like with Gel and her H with his sexual side. It took him realizing she excepted all of him to make him feel stable enough in there relationship to be himself and open up to her. Sounds like you are afraid others wont except you as who you are. Because you do not think or feel the exact way you percieve they think you should. Do you know why you feel this way? Did something/someone in the past make you feel unexcepted because you did not agree with them in every way?
It was great. It was really passionate and tender at the same time. For the first time in many years I really felt an EC between the two of us.
Funny how something as simple as being able to open up and talk and be heard and listen to another can open so many doors. Communication I think is probably the biggest factor in a relationship. But it only works if both people are talking and both people are listening and trying to understand what the other is saying. I am glad you had this experience.
Even though he doesn’t necessarily think we need to be there, he is finally willing to go because I need him to go
Maybe once you get there he will better understand and see the need for C and the benifits it can give your relationship.
Hope you have a wonderful day! I am off to the doctors shortly so I guess I need to get dressed lol.
