Chrome,

"OH NO!!!! You're not one of those HGTV "Trading Spaces" types. AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY."

No, no, no, no!!!!! I don't do residential design. Never have, never will. I absolutely hate those Trading Spaces types! I do commercial design. Think of it as Interior Architecture. Wall placement, lighting, finishes, etc.

"Hmmm, sounds relativistic to me. Using the Lorentz transformation for the spatial coordinate, it would require a relative speed of 260,000 km/s to achieve a length contraction of a factor of 2."

Precisely. All that science talk is really hot. That kind of “dirty talk” would be such a turn on in bed. “Tell me more Dr. Chromey…” (he he he)



So, we had the big MC talk last night. It went pretty well. After a lot of talking and crying (all me) he agreed to go with me.

The biggest thing that I got out of our talk last night was that the only thing in our R that he is unhappy about is that I am unhappy. I asked him if I said that I was happy – or didn’t say that I was unhappy – would he think we had a great relationship and be content and happy. He said yes, he is fulfilled with the way things are. He said that maybe he could be happier if some of the things I mentioned changed (more family and couple time), but if they didn’t happen he’d be fine too. I told him that his answer really scared me. How can he be so content and okay and I feel the exact opposite? So after saying that, he agreed that we need to see the MC.

Last nights talk really made me realize something. I am extremely dependent on other people’s approval of me, especially H. I need a lot of verbal and/or non-verbal re-assurance. Re-assurance of what though? That I am loved, valued, desired. That it’s okay to have the feelings that I do. I guess I am so into pleasing people that I fear that if my feelings displease someone, they will not like/love me anymore.

Something else happened last night that is a first. H asked me if I would like OS…go figure. It was great. It was really passionate and tender at the same time. For the first time in many years I really felt an EC between the two of us.

So, now we just wait and see what happened at MC Monday. We are in a good place. I am so happy is willing to go. Even though he doesn’t necessarily think we need to be there, he is finally willing to go because I need him to go. I think that is the kind of initiative that I needed to see from him.
I will keep you posted!

Nicky



"There are two types of people -- those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am,' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'" Frederick Collins