I am often guilty of trying to wing it and end up making it worse because I have to backtrack, placate, and supplicate when I flub up. There is something to say about being yourself, just opening up,


Chromo
Reread the above please.


first you can open up.

I have too. I have too. I have too.

AHHHH!!!

No you choose to.


second you do NOT HAVE to back track, and-- (those other F attraction killer words).
That is your feeling upon being not heard, denied, derided, or having your comments personalized.
Say what you feel. Let her deal with her feelings about it. She can handle the responsibility of it. Listen to her responses. When they are true, (occasionally they are... ) make modifications through action. Proactive action will be appreciated.



stop reassuring. Let her earn it by her actions.

There is something to say about being yourself

yes there is. Its very attractive.

being yourself is expressing your feelings, your thoughts, being comfortable with it, and liking yourself still. In fact you can almost go so far as to say, NOT caring what the OP thinks of you, to the point that you change who you are.

You do in fact engage in this type of thinking and behavior here. It causes you to be so attractive, I have a hard time restraining myself from making declarations of my undying devotion and desire.

ROTFLMAO. <sigh> moving on...

OP feelings are NYJ. not your job. Apologizing for yourself is not accepting who you are. Doesnt allow OP to accept you either.

Doing this (being yourself, setting boundaries, not apologizing) will cause conflict. It will create tension and probably even fights. The sky will not fall down. It is in fact a good thing. As long as you dont backtrack. Be sure of your boundary, and set it.