HP asked OT Oh and I understand why, once you started with the faking, you kept it up. But I am unsure why it began in the first place..? If you are HD, and presumably want the orgasms, why cheat yourself?
I think OG_Lou summed it up nicely from a man's perspective about how O's make the man feel (and thus why women fake): 1. I shared some pleasurable times/events with her. (increased bonding) 2. I am a good lover. (bonding and ego stroking) 3.. I took the time or action she needed. (I am considerate) 4. .She accepted my gift of love and sexuality (what I have is valuable and the FM wants the same thing) 5. She will have sex with me more often. (increasing the supply) 6. The sex will be better and maybe more frequent. (increasing the quality / value of sex) 7. The more value the sex is to the FM, with me, the less she will be looking elsewhere. (decreasing the potential competition's value) 8. When we both have an "O", my "O"'s are more intense. (increasing the pleasure) I hope it works that way for her too. 9. She got about an equal (or some similar word) amount of pleasure from the sexual encounter as I did.
My impression is that many women do not know how to get to that place of O-ing most of the time during sex and therefore the faking begins. Or they are simply not comfortable telling the man, I cannot usually O from IC, can you stimulte me here (clitoris, etc). Not easy to do for many reasons that have already been discussed. Stigmata also seemed perplexed as to why women would fake and OG-Lou's summary says it all. Women realize the man puts A LOT of weight on the woman's O whether he means to or not. Some guys have said they wouldn't care/mind if their S o'd or not during the act as long as she was being honest. I call BS on that. If a man had the option of being with a woman who did not enjoy sex but was honest about it and being with a woman who seemed to love sex, O all the time, etc, and had no real way of telling if she was "faking", I think most guys would choose the woman who at least put on the show. Not all men, but most. And yes, it would still be the woman's fault/problem if she chose to fake her way to a hot sex life (or at least the appearance of it). She's really only hurting herself in the end. OT seems to have learned that lesson the hard way.
