Faking Os and roadblocks to intimacy

[Stigmata]

I knew there was a reason I gave this topic a wide berth, as I had mehntioned way back in GEL's Saga thread. Tsk tsk, OT. Setting the trap. Like Wile E. Coyote painting a tunnel on the side of a cliff.

Meep-Meep! Whooooosh....here I come, trailing billows of smoke....

First. Faking is lying. I have found that lying in Rs is well...-nuff said.

Second. I absolutely cannot freaking stand when OP have the presumption to control the information I receive, information I perhaps in their brains "can't handle," or "would make me feel like less of a man." Just give me the damned information and get over yourselves. I'm a big boy and my own person.

Give me a break. I will decide how I react. You insult me and denigrate me by making that decision for me and it's more than a little arrogant IMO--even if it is very well-intentioned. Stop that. Whack to the hand. Don't touch my power. It's mine.

Now. The O. Ms. Understand that each F is diferent. Each one is like having to learn a whole new foreign language. Some are easy to figure out like pig latin while others need a friggin Rosetta Stone and even then are untranslatable stimulus-response-wise.

Get over it. It's not our responsibility. It becomes such when we have a schematic wiring diagram of the billion neural pathways and are able to pinpoint the O circuitry. Until then, try not to be selfish during LM and just pay attention. Forget about it. It's not our thing to deal with. Likewise, whether we ejac. after 30 seconds or 30 minutes it's not the Fs responsibility. It's our wiring diagram KWIS? And in both cases with practice and well-focused "mentalization" we can control these things.

Now. Faking Os. Ugh. Why do you start this Fs? Not helpful. And if you're consciously thinking about faking the O then your head aint' really into the session and you're thinking way too much. Just let it go, clear your mind, and focus on the pleasure. That's helpful.

Also. If my SO cooks a really nice dinner and it tastes like salted cardboard I am not gonna go: "oooooo....mmmmmmmm.....ahhhhhhh.....ohhhhh that's sooooo gooooood. Mmmmmmmore. Ohhhhh God. O god yesss."

If I do? I can expect to be served the same crappy salted cardboard dinner for the rest of the R, smiling stupidly while my stomach lurches and she feels so good about herself via my LIE.

I don't do this. Why? Oh, I guess because I try not to be a masochist. Or make her feel a thousand times worse when I end up in the hospital one day getting my stomach pumped after another shtty dinner of the same and then have to confess I had been faking my enjoyment of her horrible horrible dinners for 20 years.

The resultant confession which then serves to traumatize her never to make an effort in the kitchen ever again and just "show up." (sorry, Chrome, not to rub my salty cardboard dinner into the wound.)

So Ms. Not everyone climbs Mt. Everest every single time. Let it go.

Fs. Quit faking. Train your mind to reach a point of bliss where you don't have to fake and mentally give yourself the physical O, instead of worrying so much what the M might "feel" about his perceived-by-your-high decree insecure manhood.

If an F has an O with me. Fine. If not? Shrug. Doesn't make me less of a man IMO. If we both received pleasure then I'm not gonna ruin it by unEarthing an nonesential negative and subsequently crush both of our post LM buzz. There's always time for me to learn hopefully. And if not she'll just have to figure it out for herself if/when she wants one and how.

...Now, OT, you may scratch your head and wonder how the hell I managed to zip through your painted tunnel...

Meep-Meep!

-Stigmata-