Quote: He's also the kind that may not *get* what I'm doing without explicitly being told. Such as "Back off until you're ready to re-commit".
Amen sister! My W is the same way, as are most of the WAS. They think somehow it's more about THEM and something we are doing TO them instead of FOR us. The couple times I did pull back from my W, I got the same idea. The way she reacted was as if I had no reason other than her to do something and how dare I. Well, it only took a little while of that for her, AND ME, to understand that part of going "dim" or dark is that we can't care what they think about it. We can't explain it or else it really IS all about them. You are not dimming to attract his attention, you are dimming to RETRACT yours. You are going to focus on you and try to do so without the distraction that contact with him (or at least so much contact) causes you. It's a step in the process that will help you, may hurt him, and could do either to your R...RIGHT NOW. In time, what happens could be totally different from what happens right away.
You are just in a tough place, receiving mixed signals and not doing a very good job interpreting them. None of us do. I really like your idea of waiting, especially since you think he'll talk eventually. Let him take his time his way, and you take yours your way. The two WILL meet at some point and then you can talk in a way, and at a time, that works for both of you.
