Well, one of MY biggest fears, and that of a lot of us, is that I am going down this particular road and if it doesn't work, I will be back at square one again. I NEVER want to be back there again, but this process of "as if" and GAL, etc. is leading to a point where if things are not as they seem, and I buy into them, I will get hurt again, but it's time to take that risk. I think I am stronger now.
Sorry for the hijack.
As you said, punishing her will not do anything but manage to make her feel bad, which may or may not do anything posisive for your sitch. In most cases, people run from what makes them feel bad.
