_________________________________________________________ I'm going to try and work on things like conflict resolution as this is a major problem for us _________________________________________________________
This is "therapy speak" and sounds good and all, conflict resolution is important BUT....
It isn't the reason you aren't interested in sex, really. Resolving your conflicts won't make you feel more sexual AND still won't help you see "what the big fuss is about" in regard to sex. Resolving your conflicts will help you and your H be better roomates.
Lack of respect IS a reason you don't feel sexual. It is hard to have sex with someone you don't respect and who doesn't respect you. Focus on building your respect for yourself and his respect for you. Re-read Passionate Marriage or get the audio CD and listen to it 100x over. I have it and have listened to it no less than 5x and I learn something every time.
You can disagree with your partner, never resolve the conflict and if you respect one another, agree to disagree and still feel emotionally connected, heard and sexual.
As far as the "o" is concerned. I think Lil might be on to something. Many people orgasm but are still unconnected to themselves as a sexual being and to their partners. There are several books on the shelf for women about learning to please yourself and going from there. I think one is called "For yourself." Check these out. Learn what your own body likes. For many women masturbation is a way to locate their sexual desire and then extend it to their mates.
