no you dont seem cold to me. I understand why the intimacy is hard with his anger.
However I do see an attitude coming from you that I dont understand, nor would I care for -- no, let me rephrase, --- I wouldnt even have such a R. Its an attitude that men are terrified of occuring in there M, and causes many of them to think women dont like sex, and are cold and calculating. I dont think you are this, but I am wondering why and how you are slipping down this road. Leverage perhaps? only source of power? Its not. so dont do yourself the disservice of treating it as such.
What am I referring too?
If I'm going to want to have sex with him, I'm going to want a payoff
Seperate your issues. The backyard, your husband not following thru with projects, has nothing to do with your sex life.
Sex is a necessary component of your M. Its has a huge effect on your (forget him for a minute) mental and physical health. Youll survive without it, but it has a huge effect on your physiology. Its necessary for your emotional connection with him. Not only is withholding vindictiveness, (which is negative emotional energy) its self flaggelation.
Is the sex not satisfying or enjoyable too you? Try being more 'selfish' and proactive about it then. Other then that idea, your going to need a very open ability to communicate and discuss this with each other. If the sex is not that enjoyable to you, and your afraid of his reaction towards you, if you bring it up, (understandable from his anger at other things) I guarantee that it will not change. If the sex is good, great. I threw that out there, cause Im just ruminating on various reasons why your slipping down this, sex as a reward for him, path.
Go mow the lawn if you need some help getting in the mood.
Oh yeah. If the toilet needs cleaning, why dont you clean it?
