Quote: Unfair burden that he's not aroused until you are aroused. Okay, I'm tracking ya. Is this desire-after-arousal thing a legitimate reason for me always going "first"? Uh, yeah, if you want to have sex, that is.
This is very close to the normal dynamic of my marriage, and many other men on this board...from the man's point of view. It never stops feeling kind of weird when I hear it out of your mouth, though. Or any woman's mouth, for that matter.
I'm not clear on what you're referring to as the "normal dynamic" of your marriage? Surely not that your W is expected to bring the heat? Of do you mean that YOU'RE always expected to bring the heat and it seems weird when a woman (HP) says it? Sorry, I think there was an unclear antecedent in there someplace.
I think we can generalize that in most of the R's on this board, the HD person is expected to bring the heat, whether the HD person is male or the female. And the LD partner claims "desire-after-arousal" whether the LD person is male or the female.
Hp, didn't you and your H go around about that "never thinks about sex during the day" thing, and he finally admitted that he DOES think sex a lot, but pushes the thoughts aside? Or maybe I'm getting him mixed up with someone else.
I'm off to Wal-Mart for water softener crystals and cat food. THAT should clear my head, I generally have insights at Wal-Mart.
