I agree with Gel and you that a T may end up being a option I will have to engage in.
Depressed yes I can go there I am. I have been trying to address this. I have even been trying to address this with the H. And acknowledge that I know that it is not a easy thing to deal with for either of us. And that my depression is deep has been for alteast the last 5 years. But the last year it has become disabling also. We had a talk along these lines today. It did not go anywhere but we had it.
And yes I agree that all these things I feel are not in relationsip to my H some are me probably alot are based on my own feelings towards myself. But I need to distinquish or define exactly what it is that I am so discontent with even within myself and have been for so long.
Maybe once I sort through how alone I feel in this world and the what causes those feelings the rest will fall in place. Maybe it will be a opening to discover why I am so unhappy and allow me to find something fufilling in my life. All I do know for fact right now is the emptiness I feel inside is stifflingly overwhelming right now. And I do not want to stuff it anymore nor do I think I can. It has become to large to be contained within the shell of my body.
Two broken people equates to a broken M.
Those are profound words LFL.
You DO deserve to be happy and don't forget it.
I am wondering if I even know how to be happy. Deeply happy.
