Why do you say your H doesn't accept you for who you are, how exactly do you think he wants to change you
My out going personality for starters. He likes it as long he is around and is the center focus of it. He does not like it when put in context of me being in the work place or public in general. The way I dress. I am not prudish and he would like me to be. You know how everyone was discribing the way they bundled up to go to bed a few weeks ago that is how he would like me to bundle up to go out. So know one has a clue what lies beneath. I am more the tank top blue jeans type he finds that to revealing. My lack of need for physical touch compared to him. He would like for that to be my number one LL. When in truth I seem to fall more into the acts of service type.
This are the first three things that pop to mind my H would like to change about me. For me to be lots less outgoing socially for me to dress more prudish and for me to be more physically needy.
What would I like to change about him.
He is rigid I would like him to be more layed back. He is very unexcepting of things that differ from his POV I would like him to be more layed back and excepting of others individuality. He believes that a married couple needs no one then each other for anything. I cannot except that I still need other things in my life other then him.
Those are just the first three that come to mind.
How is it changing the fundamental you and who Chrissy is?
It takes away from all of it. The basics of my personality.
You come across to me as taking on the entire responsibility for you not having a "connection".....YOU can only do so much in that department
Not allow of it maybe my mindset right now is making me feel that I am responsible for the most of it. I am the one so miserably discontent here so it is my need to find a way to deal with it or change it.
And sometimes I do feel it is just me, I have read so many post from so many posters and can say Oh thats not a problem or a issue in my marriage From the walk away spouse boards to the sexual issue boards to the infidelity boards. The SSM board is the closes I can find that relates to my sitch even though it is not SS. So maybe since I do not have alot of these other issues my issue is myself.Nothing else maybe I am one of those people who are never satisfied echo's through my brain alot this days
My issue is this I feel empty within my marriage and self. Which comes first or maybe which one may have caused the other seems irrelavent at this point, Just like which came first the egg or the chicken. It just is how I feel. But how to get past it is relevant and I am making no headway on it and getting highly discouraged to the point of thinking maybe this is really all there is.
Again I am not in a logical mind frame even I can see that maybe I need to just take another day or two away from the boards and hope it is just PMS talking or something.
Gotta go find something for the kids for dinner hope all have a good night
