Everything's going reasonably well. Maybe it's the lava lamp I just put on my desk that's helping to keep me calm. I'm taking Corri's advice for the moment and just doing nothing. At least on the relationship front.
At work, I am swamped. Since I've switched to a new unit, there's a HUGE turf battle going on. And I'm the turf.
Without getting into details, I'm currently doing the work of at least a person and a half, I've had to work nights and every day for the last few weekends. And this is not private practice, so I'm not getting paid extra. On the other hand, my new office does have a beautiful harbor view...
Anyway, oddly enough, my putting in all these extra hours and just letting go on the relationship front, has had a positive effect on X.
He keeps complaining that I'm not around enough, that we're not doing enough things together. And he's even managed to give me a couple of hugs and pats on the arm Which is a BIG thing for him, given his aversion to physical touch. And he bought me a nice present. And he's started doing a project I asked him to ages ago, but haven't mentioned since.
Perhaps I just need less than other people. I don't know. I don't care so much about physical touch, though it's nice.
The only thing I really miss is hot wild monkey sex. You know, the kind when afterwards, you can't believe that you actually did that. And I've accepted that I won't be getting that any time soon. And that X is far, far away from feeling comfortable with something like that.
One not-so-good thing. A couple of days ago, X got an email from the coach who sexually abused him. Just a nice chatty email, asking how X was doing, and what he was up to, and, by the way, did he hae any kids?
I was furious. As far as I know, this is the first time X's abuser has gotten in touch with him since X was 14 or so. I told X that we should threaten to sue or prosecute him, since, undoubtedly he had just moved on to (or was looking for) some new victims.
But other than that, things have been pretty calm. I've basically removed myself, mentally and physically from the situation and I do feel a certain peace in not trying to do anything.
Which is a BIG thing for him, given his aversion to physical touch. And he bought me a nice present. And he's started doing a project I asked him to ages ago, but haven't mentioned since.
