sorry this is more a rant than advice, and a negative one at that, but I guess I'd rather post it here then vent at home.
No problem man. You know my thread is your thread. As for what you said, I know what you mean. It's as if OUR "as if" is what makes the world go round. As soon as we crack a bit, we are back to being the total a-holes that started all this in the first place...lol.
Try this one on for size too. It seems like after these exchanges, my W really tries to, with her actions only of course, reassure me that things are ok. Does your W do that too. She doesn't get angry, or go towards the OM so far as I can tell, rather, she seems to realize a bit more of what of what she's doing and something, guilt or whatever, causes her to rebound a bit. Who knows.
