Thanks C1T. Whew. One down, many to go...lol. I can't tell you how hard it was to post that. I almost didn't but I did it to be honest with you all and to help others who may be reading my sitch to feel like they are not alone in making mistakes. Somehow I have gotten a reputation around here and to honor that, I feel obligated to post the good with the bad.
dont beat yourself up about - we all have days and times when we slip into 'old' ways and cant help ourselves from saying something...
Yea, I suppose. I just have such high hopes for myself. I think I am doing so good and then I make these stupid decisions that sets me back weeks. Also, I don't buy that we can't help ourselves. I thought I did all I could last night to "help myself" and when the time came I threw all that out the window and just went with what I felt. I made that decision. She didn't make me. I just want to know why a guy that knows better would do such a stupid, self-sabotaging thing.
The best thing now is to completely forget about it. Dont mention it again to your W. Just act as though nothing happended and go back to doing what you did before...
I want to do this. The necklace may as well be me catching them in bed. It's that powerful in my mind now. I need to take away it's power.
I dont think there is any harm now and again to say what you think anyway - as long as its not every week. now and again sometimes can have a good effect and make our partners sit back and think...
Well, unfortunately, it is nearly every week for me. Most of the time it's not nearly this bad. Usually just a mood or a one liner. Hell, maybe those are worse because I am not being as direct. I DO think it made her think a bit. At NO time did she get so much angry as contemplative. We'll see. Maybe she's planning her move when we get back...lol...gasp...choke...
Think you also need to accept in your own mind that you W might have been meeting a friend, who knows!! But by getting jealous and questioning her is not going to work, unfortunately this could well push your W the other way... Try and ignore it.......
Of course, this is the core of what is making me feel so terrible this morning. It comes back to the necklace. Why be wearing it on the outside of a turtleneck sweater to meet a friend? Ok fine. Speculation over. I need to forget it. Yes. Will it push her the other way if I can't? Sure, I think so. Gotta stop.
Better still - you go out shopping one day and do the same if she tries to ring you... create a bit of mystery about yourself... make your W start worrying about where you are and what you are doing for a change...
I do this all the time. I go shopping, to basketball games, with the kids, etc. I do things on my own. As many of you can attest to though, when I don't answer MY cell phone, all he!! breaks loose with her. Somehow I need to be at her beckon call yet she feels no such duty. Trust me, I don't answer on purpose but I can't see the good in it most of the time.
