Sage, I neglected my W for along time and really came up short in meeting her needs at times. She also says I talked down to her, but in counceling shes been unable to give any specifics and no one else but her father sees it or can say I have. She also can give no specifics on her resentments towards me, just little things that would mean nothing to someone not looking for things to be angry about. Some of us think shes been unhappy for so long (most her life) that she's finding reasons to stay that way, and allways the victom she continues to blame everyone but herself. Her family turned there back on her and even some of her friends told her she was making a huge mistake ending our marriage back in August when she wanted a divorce. It caused alot of problems the relationship between her andher mother, and it was allready strianed and allways has been, but she likes to blame it on my because her mom and I are so close. My W has alot of imotional issues and holds grudges against anyone who dissagrees or goes against her in anyway, she has allways lived in the past bringing up things from many years ago that have no relavance in her/our lives today. Ive never touched my w, called her names or cursed her in any way, just didnt show her the love and effection she deserved and needed at times. We never fight now and everyone close to us thinks we've just got everything going for our family, and we do. The addoption on two of our children was final in June and we've talked about starting to do foster care again, matter a fact we talked about it with freinds and family at my daughters b-day party last Sunday. We've also been talking about selling our house and buying down to pay off all our dept so my W can stay home full time again and stop working, she only works part time now but she does much better and so do the kids when shes home. She actualy brought home a couple of home for sale flyers last night to show me and asked if theres anyway we could sell now to buy one of them cause she liked it so much. I never intitiate R talks and i'll try to give her space if she'll let me. Funny thing, a couple of months ago sitting in the living room together she said "we really are on the road to recovery, to making are marriage better arent we"? I said I hope so cause I love you and she said the same back. Thank you for taking time to reply, it means alot to me as this last 8 months has been such a roller coaster. I'll never give up on us and no matter what she says or does i'll continue to treat her the only way I know how, with unconditional love.
