if you had patched things up after the A you probably would not have done the work on yourself, you would have swept it under the rug and made some lameass attempt at a Fresh Start. And nothin would have changed. The 2nd betrayal pushed you clear down to rock bottom, where you would be forced to get real.
what if you give the control freak within a rest for a while? Good things have come from this failure, they always do.
sorry about my lame attempt at comfort. I know I suck at it! H wanted it but would get pissed at the very thought of me giving it to him. Talk about illogical!!
Hey - don't forget it is the egg that sends biochemical messages that "call" and "direct" the sperm. The receiver is as active as the giver sometimes.
- Processing....
(mental archived flash image of shapely young woman in skin tight dress, push up bra, and no undergarments)
....oy vey. Yes. Methinks there was some transmission going on there for my receivers to pick up.
<shaking head vigorously to clear>
Which leads to that damned biological arachnid monkey wrench I can't get past nor understand quite what message the Creator is sending to my puny brain.
Big honkin' pretty black widow female spider.
Puny tiny washed out male, barely a fraction of her size.
He taps on the web to get her attention (idiot!)
wink wink, nudge nudge, the deed is done. CHOMP. <burp>
WTF?
A. That better be mindblowing sex. And I'm talking the reality-warping kind.
B. I'm glad I don't believe in reincarnation.
Sheesh. Like standing there in front of "The Reincarnation Wheel." Give it a nice spin. "Noooo spider, nooooospider!!"
When I have my judgment day I will be sure to mention this disturbing M-F behavior pulled from my list of "Need to Knows."
Anyway, we know that our comfort is often received by men as "Woman, just back off and leave me alone" but we just can't resist.
- Sigh. I know. As HP would say if she were an M. "Women."
I'm violating my own policy to explain my agenda here. Crud. But I don't want you Fs to feel clumsy. We should all be so lucky to have comfort from time to time from OP like you quality folk.
Let's just say...hmmmm...another illustration.
A young boy is standing outside school with his group of chums. His mom drops him off, notices a smudge on his cheek and cowlick. "Here. Let me clean you up/straighten your hair." Lick. Wipe Wipe, smooth, smooth.
[sounds of chuckling from other small Ms.]
"Awww, moooom." (lots of pulling face away, squirms, and contortions)
"Let me give my big boy a kiss."
[more chuckling and now snickering in background]
"Moooo-ooom."
...so kinda like tapping into that ingrained vibe KWIM?
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
Corri, I thanked you for your cheering up (and the rest of the girls also.)
I know your humor. You were right my crap is mine, hers is hers. I much prefer your floggings, there not nearly as painful.
I tease and poke people here that open up, I can take it as well as give thats all I was referring to. Gosh if the BB's strong woman cant put some smack down on me, Ill never find that hard headed woman I am looking for.
I refuse your apology. <thwack with the wiffle ball bat> Take those gloves off. It tickles. <thwack again>
You have not casued me any additional pain. To the contrary you have brought me many laughs and kept me on my toes.
I said it when I first got here, be honest with me, no one can lash me harder then I do myself.
karen and HP,
I have much much appreciation for this board. (where is the paypal collection plate?)
Im not in that much pain, just getting some things out, (and as I said at the beginning of this thread, coming out of my cave. So maybe Im putting aside some of my control and checking it out here. because I like you people, and you cant really hurt me. I can just close my computer and run away if needs be. ) So. (again) I really appreciate your not clumsy, not lame cyber offerings of comfort. Us guys suck at receiving. Goes against our genetics.
what if you give the control freak within a rest for a while?
You gonna join me? Im single now in a metropolis full of sharks, snakes and users. So..... no. Good things have come from this failure, they always do.
hmmpf. perspective. pbttthhhh. your right.
what if this was just the way it had to happen? obviously. It is what is. I know what your hinting at though. NO. you would have swept it under the rug and made some lameass attempt at a Fresh Start
No. We.... I was working at changing our R with Marriagebuilders/counseling- wanting to at least.
I have to run, but I just wanted to take this opportunity to point out a M/F difference and women personalizing.
I espouse for men to not personalize mild protestations and in fact ignore the words and plow.
This is something for women to do the same on.
Boys are probably genetically prone to not wanting comfort. Just be left alone. Environment though as stig touched on reinforces it tremendously. In sports if M's get injured you suck it up. walk it off. quit whining, dont be baby. etc.
typically when girls get hurt its time out and everyone gathers to comfort.
So ladies just cause your H grouses, isnt graciously accepting, doesnt KNOW how to receive comfort, doenst mean its not appreciated and welcomed.
Ignore his words. Dont personalize. and just give him comfort anyways.
yes I am.
Corri. Even though I dont accept this apology, we will just call it even for the one you did owe me back when. and didnt give me. fun fun. <tug the ponytail> hehe.
Now that I have my breath back. I boldly took your comments to BF for myself. Same difference anyway, dagnabit.
Stupid text and crossed wires, unintended meanings. Cripes, how many wars did the telegraphh/teletype start anyway? Must have been one or two:
"Greetings, Germany." Stop. "We are going to drop a bombshell on your capitol." Stop.
[faulty wiring causes message to be cut off henceforth]
Rest of message Never Received:
"She is quite a starlet." Stop. "She will be arriving over Berlin and lowered from a zeppelin." Stop.
...anyway, back to you Corri. And your comments to BF:
About x pulling the rip cord 2x. "What's that say about me?"
Whose back of mind are you peering into, woman?
Funny. First second chance I've ever given in my life to anyone. And I never receive likewise (not that I'm looking for any mind you).
...says a lot about me. Nice. Think I'll grind that one up in my mental machinations for a while.
Don't mind me. Ill just be over here in the corner smelling my own psychological/attraction stench.
sniff. sniff.
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
Karen, who has hair as black as the black widow spider you mentioned....
- Likewise with the visual. I remember this girl in H.S. She had really shiny black hair like that. Outside during lunch the sun would hit her thick wavy locks and put her head in this neat blue-cast halo. Never saw that before.
As long as you don't have a big red hourglass birthmark or some such on your back it's all good for you and H....and especially H.
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
Maybe I'll have one tatooed on my azz so H knows who he is dealing with! ROTFLMAO
If that didn't send a message I fail to see what else would, frankly. Gives a whole meaning to the saying, "Do or Die", huh? Be afraid....be very afraaaiiid....
Thanks, Karen, you just made my Friday.
-Stigmata-
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
Speaking of tatoos on the azz, I'm out with my neighbor last night for a quick drink to say bon voyage before she goes on vacation, and this random guy comes up to me and says "hey baby (yes, he literally said "hey baby") why don't you give me a call later. My number is tatooed on your azz." ? Huh ? Is this some new pick up line I'm not aware of? Lol Then he just walked (stumbled) away. Sheesh. At least we had a good laugh over that one. Men!
) So. (again) I really appreciate your not clumsy, not lame cyber offerings of comfort. 
