I'm curious....why would you say ("It would be so strange to do that with H. And not just on his end, but mine as well. It's so.....not intimate, as much as raw sex.") For me, it's completely the opposite....it's a most definite intimate connection.
Back when I was LD I would close my eyes to avoid looking at my XH and seeing that look of desire on his face.....I would close my eyes and detach. The one man in particular who helped to coax me out of my LD stage of life would constantly encourage me to look at him, look him in the eyes when he ML to me. It was very intimate....but a very hard thing for me to do at first. It's hard for me to explain but I felt vulnerable during sex, keeping my eyes closed helped to protect me.
