- Yes. Me give Corri big headache on thread. Now Corri give Stigmata big headache on Blackmata/Stigfoot thread. Reciprocity is 9/10ths of the....law? landica? landica?
Just curios. How long have you been in the resentment stage? Why are you hanging on to it? What's it doing for you?
- Ohhhhh, only since the morning I went and rented the UHaul and threw all of my chit into the back of it 4 months ago is all.
(I'm asking this in my very gentle female voice, not my club carrying Corri voice).
- Huh? What's this voice I hear? Hmmmmm....whenever I hear Fs change their tonality I know 2 things. A. They are trying to wheedle something out of me via their sweet melodic liltings. (After which I of course cave every time.) Or they're sending an important communication to my tiny brain via various tonal variation testings for me to "get it";and it eventually ends up in the grand finale of wanton screaming for me to "think, man, think!"
Very contradictory to your Zen musings/mantras... un-taoist of you... got any thoughts?
- Yeah, really. Percolating resentment. Not very Taoism According To Stig. Yeahs about now I'm feelin' like Jimmy Swaggart sitting in his car down some dark alley with one hand on a nudie mag and the other on his....ahem. (yikes, close to "amen.")
Also, I need to know the truth as to OM situation. Hire a detective and get the question answered for yourself so you can deal, one way or the other. Unless you don't want to know, which is cool... but get rid of the obsession.
- You're right. But this is the big test for me. Need more convos eventually about the fallout. If verbal yes to OM (and not via private dick) I will respect that and more than likely move on and be cordial but superficial in future contact. If no no no and turns out to be OM then it's the nail in the coffin. Zero trust. No friends. No contact. No acknowledgement till death do I take part. A friend doesn't lie to me like that about such an huge issue to protect self. I deserve better.
But I have to hear the verbals. Need to at some point deconstruct where things went awry in mutual setting. Private dick wouldn't give me that putting her on the witness stand (not to grill, just the deposition stuf) answer.
Why can't you sleep? Anxiety? Depression? Can't shut off the mental images/voices?
- Major major pain sandwich and I'm the dead meat. V Day is stupid made up day for Hallmark to peddle their drivel but always did something special. First time it was just another day. And now x birthday to deal with. Double barrels into the old ticker KWIM?
Do you want the R? If you do, go get your wife. If you don't know yet, I get it.
- Uh. Yeah, the second one.
Answer if you want, don't if you can't. Not pushing.
Oh yes you are. Or you wouldn't have asked, dear.
My D is supposed to be final one week from Friday. The one thing I will always remember is when I told him I wanted out, he said to me, "I don't have time for this."
- WTF? Man, that would make my life soooooo much easier right now. Criminy. "I don't have time to give over to (what, the last 14 years?) of our lives."
The only single instance where I can ever ever ever justify myself or someone else saying this exact line to my/their SOs would have to be while I'm at the controls of a plummeting commercial jet....with air traffic control shouting directions in one ear and my W/SO screaming into my other ear about wanting out. Here that response fits pretty well IMO.
Summed it all up for me pretty nicely
And how.
-Stigmata-
PS. Using soft Stig voice and not angry man meltdown at GEL's H voice now to you, Corri. Good luck with the D date. BTW. Had long talk with best friend today. His D just finalized yesterday after 2.5 years of S/Reco/S etc. theatrics. We actually laughed. He said. Ya know? It's weird. It's like having an aggravating neighbor livinng in the apt. next to you....blasting horrible music every night for years. And suddenly one day he moves. And it's all quiet. Like...where the hell is that damned anoying music that keeps me up all night? How am I gonna sleep now with all of this peace, calm and quiet? Sheesh!
The difference between a warrior and an ordinary man is the warrior views everything as a challenge; the ordinary man views everything as either a blessing or a curse.
-Yaqui shaman Don Juan-
...and that holds 2x true for nice guy wussies, DJ
