Hhhhhhhhhhm - this conversation reminds me of something I heard on Christian radio this am. It had to do with "peacemaking" which in this case referred to a conflict resolution/mediation program. Anyway, the two ladies who spoke talked about how conflicts are not necessarily spoken. People who don't speak up can also be in conflict with someone else.
Frequently the person who isn't speaking up is guilty of the sin of "idolatry". In this case, "relationship idolatry" - elevating the importance of relationhip above God to the point where they won't rock the boat due to the power that they have ascribed to that R. That is what those "unassertive" people are sometimes doing. BTW - these authors define idolatry as "being willing to sin if you can't get the object or being willing to sin in order to get the object."
I apologize for the Christian perspective on this but I think we can all ask ourselves whether we elevate the R to a place that doesn't allow for us to be ourselves, act ourselves or handle conflict appropriately.
