He said that he noticed I'd called a few times I told him that we have a lot to talk about I told him that I loved him and I wanted him to come home.
Sounds like the same old pursuit cycle again...
I said, "I thought you told me that... He said, "Well, that's not entirely the truth."
... pursuing someone who is not honest with you...
Are you really thinking about coming back home?" He said, "Yes."
... who one day adamantly and categorically states repeatedly he's not coming back, and then the next day gives you [false, I think] hope. I think it's false for two reasons. 1. "thinking" about coming back home doesn't mean he's leaning for it, it could just mean he's "thinking" on the topic, for and against it. Or, he could just be saying that to keep you from moving on, so that he still has his safety net that you were beginning to take away from him near the start of the year.
And 2. His actions speak much louder than his words, considering: "If he wants this to be over with so badly, then why does he continue to put off coming over to talk to me in person about what we are going to do? And if he's thinking about coming back, then why is o.w. with him today?" The answers to which may be, 1. You're making these conclusions that the "Ifs" should result in the "thens", in effect, expecting H to think as you do or expecting that life follows such a direct path 2. He's not really thinking about it as much as you are.
What I really wish to point to you Hope, is: Considering that H has not anywhere near worked on his issues and put them away, nor worked on how to overcome them when they arise again, yet, you want a relationship with him as he is now (or is it you seek a relationship with your vision of what he could be IF), to be very careful what you wish for.
