"you know when I look in the mirror I see an attractive woman . Yes, I have a few extra pounds on me....but I'm an attractive woman! I'm intelligent , I have a great sense of humor , I can be sexual in a way many men dream of ...in short...I'm a great catch . But I'd be stupid to continue to put up with this...and I'm not stupid"
An affirmation-laden tirade if I've ever seen one. AWESOME! That is exactly what he needs to hear. That is exactly what YOU need to hear. You deserve a great marriage and a great partner. Maybe it will be your H. I think it definitely can happen, and I applaud you going the extra mile to try to make it happen, to give him another chance to better himself. That's exactly what he would be doing if he does all the hard work to stay with you, bettering HIMSELF.
"I am willing to do that.....but only as long as my conditions are met. Yes, that's selfish"
No, its not. You didn't say if you don't meet my needs I am going to physically harm you. You set a boundary, "I cannot stay in a relationship with a man who acts in this way." That is not selfish, that is in fact very loving.
I am amazed at your strength. Keep your chin up. Best wishes.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
