but I have never withheld nor given sex to 'get what I want.'
Good for you. But this is also why you don’t have a clue what I’m talking about. Put yourself on the receiving end of this first, in a man’s shoes, before your start throwing out your psycho analysis.
In spite of all you and others may say, about how I am so angry, so insensitive to women's issues, know that your enlightenment, your methods, did nothing to salvage your marriage. And others are still struggling, trying to find an answer. I have completed my journey. My wife and I are well on the road to recovery, we have been enjoying frequent sex lately, and have buried the hatchet to bond as a team.
Maybe one day we may even rise to the kind or true love you you seem to be preaching, but in the mean time our house is once again filling with laughter and fun. And I am getting sex, my wife is getting the support and understanding she has always wanted, allowing her to drop her defenses, and you MrsNOP really don't seem to understand that there is more than one path to happiness.
But when women use their upset feelings to trigger a fix from the man, it is a form of control and it is wrong. If a man does the same, then he is wrong too
No its not 'wrong'. Even the Ebook 'Women Men Adore' tells women to use there emotionality to effect change in the R. It effects you deeply and the guilt irritates you. Once again thats your feeling.
Its existed for millinia, and it will always exist as long as we are homo sapiens and not Vulcans. Even you --Mr. Spock, --cant control your emotions when you feel something is unjust, misunderstood, or unfair, as you have clearly demonstrated today. Women are what they are. It is what it is. Deal with it. Fighting it is going to be flailing against the ocean untill you drown.
Cobra I see a deep resentment/fear in you of outspoken different opinionated women. IMO that causes you to have an incorrect? well lets just say suprisingly overboard response. When Mrs. Nop and Lil used to get irritable with each other, well they are just two opinionated ladies. I expect that from them. I expected and eagerly anticipate more of conflict, with OM, like the first one you and I had with each other. I also knew I would get tested by the women here from the very get go. It continues still. (some just cant help themselves. ) But your response to Mrs Nop even IF she was attacking censoring deminishing blah blah you---- damn dude. Im over here with my mouth hanging open in suprise.
FWIW, my x never used sex --not once --as a tool. When we had blowouts neither of us wanted to boink. I certainly wasnt going to reward her when she was being a --IMO ridiculous B. (cause Im always right... no chance I was a genuine P&!ck at times...heheh) We ML alot, right up to the day she told OM 'I love you'.
Many women don't want it to be true, because it is not very attractive in our eyes, being the complex beings that we are, but whatcha gonna do
<pondering---show some of my cards before MPT antes up..... ahh I dont need her money/validation... >
Just as many men dont find women attractive who are simply interested in their financial abilities and baby producing/fatherly attributes. But not one exists who doesnt have this as a very BASIC need that if not met will override all the other 'Wants'. Watcha gonna do? (men and women)
Deal with it.
Rant.
Never once on this board have I seen a man attact a woman and call her sexually unattractive for her needs, in a place where not only is it a insecurity that is already being prodded, but it is trying to be understood if not also being actively worked on and attempts being made to fix it. It was inexcusable and I hope she comes back and responds to me with something other then a apology to Cobra (even though he is a horses ass right now) so I can LITERARily PIMP smack her some more.
There is nothing new going on here. I have stated before and I will state again if needed, the thing that pisses me off is not a strong, opinionated woman. I feel that I get into debates with HP, GEL, LFL, Lil and even Corri, without getting as emotionally ticked off as I have with MrsNOP. Why the difference? One reason only – in my MrsNOP was mounting a continual “disagreement” over one little point after another in an attempt to push her agenda over mine. There was no rhyme or reason to it other that to try and discredit the entire premise of my position. And it was a position that I had clearly said did not apply to everyone, that I acknowledged was simplistic but that I felt had great, though limited, value.
The fact that I supported Schlessinger’s claim that the feminist movement perpetuates much of this matter is what I think was making MrsNOP mad, and what I think she was trying to cut down. If she doesn’t agree, then she can say so like Corri, GEL and others did. No, don’t minimize what she was really after. Go back and read the posts. There was not one little point that she did not try to challenge. And for what purpose? To shoot holes in what as been acknowledged to be a leaky argument?
I felt before, and I still do now, that she has a strong control nature and tries to exert that control on this board. But what I really hate is someone who does so without wanting to acknowledge the other person’s position. MrsNOP is not interested in a respectable discussion over differing view (though she claims to be). She likes to tactfully pry under as many stones as possible, uncover any inconsistencies she can, and then “win” by having tactfully back you into as much a corner as she can. There can be no other purpose to this that to satisfy her ego. For this reason I never went to lengths to engage her in discussion. I saw this fight coming up months ago.
I KNOW you don't. And I will ask you, sincerely, when your initial anger with me has subsided, to really read my last, somewhat lenghthy post to you. And then perhaps you will figure it out for yourself.
Otherwise, I truly have nothing left to say to you, Cobra. I wish you all the very best.
but in the mean time our house is once again filling with laughter and fun. And I am getting sex, my wife is getting the support and understanding she has always wanted, allowing her to drop her defenses
Well I am very happy for you. Sounds like you figured out how to speak to your W.
I saw this fight coming up months ago
Ahh thats why -in the words of Stig-- it didnt seem very organic. I read all of it. What I saw was different then what you saw/responded too.
Thats cool, it takes all kinds. Many of the rest of us will gladly look forward to Mrs. Nops insightful, clearly expressed opinions.
Corri.
I saw some similar sentence structure and the recurring --"she needs to" etc. It honestly got my suspicions up. There are some lurkers that drop in occasionally and drop a scenario to see what reaction it gets. Thats why I always wait for a week or so before replying to most Men.
) But your response to Mrs Nop even IF she was attacking censoring deminishing blah blah you---- damn dude. Im over here with my mouth hanging open in suprise. 