Ack, but wait, why isn't she wearing the new PJs you bought her?
Is the shift to avoid wearing your V-day present OR to reach out to you?
See, I can second guess along with the rest of you. Another reason not to worry about it until you are in an R in which you can discuss them.
Anyway, one more bit of advice which may sound contrary to what else I've said but really isn't.
(1) Quit needing your W. Say to yourself, I am not a victim, I am choosing my own path, I will have a wonderful life. Say it over and over until you believe it. You may need to do it multiple times a day as you feel yourself slip.
(2) When you feel that with certainty (which may come and go, lol), be very direct about what is going on with you. That is, DON'T WALK ON EGGSHELLS, DON'T PASSIVELY AGGRESSIVELY HINT AROUND. Try saying things like, "W, here's a new cute/sexy pajama set. I love you sleeping in a t-shirt and feeling the heat from your skin. I feel uncomfortable twinges of jealousy though because I don't recognize the t-shirt so I thought I'd do something about it. Cuz, I really want to keep enjoying the feel of your skin without those annoying thoughts going through my mind." OR "I feel so insecure and unsettled because I don't understand where we are in this R." OR "I'm going to have to distance myself from you while we are in a place in which our commitment to a monogomous (emotionally and physically) R is not clear." OR (W, you are driving me crazy lately with that smile you give me when I flirt with you. Come over here, take off those clothes, and bend over the couch."
Yes, I'm serious about talking to her in any of those ways when you can do so directly without neediness.
