Waiting. Just waiting. W is not answering her phone today. Needed to tell her about a funds transfer she wanted done. Nothing. Ok so maybe she felt smothered but to go from answering her phone all the time, and calling me all the time (oh, and getting pissed if I EVER didn't answer for her) to now not answering for hours at a time irks me. Then she makes up reasons why she didn't answer, or maybe she doesn't. I know you all kill me when I do this but I am just comparing my W with who she has always been and when I see signs that parts of that woman are coming back, I think the rest of her is too. The part of her that doesn't answer her phone seems to be directly tied to the OM. I guess if I don't call, she can't NOT answer...lol. I thought this was past us now, OM or no OM. I am expecting too mu..er... Ok, I am expecting, and that's bad. Gotta stop, especially today. So I can't ask her what's up, I can't call her, I can't trust her, so I am relegated to just sitting back and detaching still. Great. I know better but I thought I may be able to relax for a couple hours. I WILL relax but I will have to work on it a bit more. There are real world positives and real world negatives in my sitch. There are also a world of thoughts in my head that I really need to put a stop to. I know I need to...Stop sign vision... So, before it's said, I know I am bringing this all on myself to some extent and it's up to me to stop it. I am not a victim and I am acting like one. Own the moment...
