I am 14 months into this and appear to be on the road to recovery. We just completed a marriage retreat where the W came away with knowledge that all marriages go through stages and ours was no different. We get along very well for the most part, but as things go well for us, I find myself consumed with anger for allowing my marriage to dwindle to the point where the W found comfort in an EA. I am also quite hurt, angry and disappointed with her that she thought so little of our marriage (19 yrs) that she would resort to such a thing that is so against her belief system. Her total focus was being the best mother to our kids that she possibly could which is in direct contrast because it is the kids that are hurt the worst by an A and the aftermath of divorce. I feel the resentment building in me and still grieve the innocence of the relationship we use to have. So, the question is maybe I have not truly forgiven her or myself or both. I can’t seem to move past this. I have written many, many letters, notes, and cards, to her expressing myself, my feelings, my love for her, and my part in all this mess, but have not received a single written note from her. I know she wants our marriage to work, but I am running out of steam. I feel very hurt and undesirable and like the sun really never does shine anymore. What can I do to reach within her heart?
