I echo what Corri says as well. If you already know she doesn't appreciate anything done in a sexual context (which is what you've stated)....why include that in your V-Day gifts? Romantic....doesn't have to be sexual at all. A slightly erotic note for her to read for herself, isn't likely to be appreciated by her (thereby disappointing you) and a nightie with silk boxers....sexual expectancy is attached to that. While, I, as an HD woman would love something like that....an LD woman isn't likely to go for stuff like that.
Giant....I think the rest of your idea is a splendid one, I just think including anything (at least at this point) that is remotely sexual, will be perceived by her as PRESSURE and backfire on you. Don't set yourself up for disappointment right now.
You seem like a wonderful person, and many women would appreciate such romantic gestures....but remember, not everyone appreciates the same types of things. If you really want to make her feel loved/appreciated on Valentine's Day (which to me is the point of the day afterall) then do things you know SHE WILL like.....things that haven't backfired on you in the past. I fear some of your approach in gift giving is taken in a manner of things YOU might like....rather than things you KNOW she will like.
BTW...I really like the fact that you include your kids to a certain extent
