She did OK with the driving plan. Turned out it didn't happen. The 17 yr old hunk had to do some family stuff, so he didn't go to the party. She ended up going with girlfriends whom I drove. So much the better.
Her birthday isn't until the end of this month...but she won't celebrate it with a big party til this summer. We have a friend who is moving into an 8,000 sq ft. house with tennis court and pool, etc. D15 wants to have her party there and friend says OK. I guess it will work OK if everyone is in agreement with the idea. I have no idea how H will react, but I really don't care. This is not about him. It is what D15 wants.
He wanted to buy her a car for her 16th birthday, but she told him she would rather have a digital movie camera. He is very disappointed because he knows that buying the car would really make me mad.
I am working on my financials, which are due any day now, according to my L. I am in a race with time and feeling very stressed out. I have to write this narrative which is very difficult because my L told me to make my H out to be such an ass. While that is not hard to do, I am really not up to it....but if I have to.....I will!
I called H today to tell him that someone left a message on my machine reminding him that he had a Dr's appt. tomorrow. He says, "I know"......
then I hear nothing, silence.
So I say, "Hey, I think the padres are going to have a long season (they have only won one game so far)...and he says, "yeah, I guess so".
((((silence))) on the line.
Then, I say, I took D15 to that musical lay at school and we had a good time." He says, "glad to hear it." ((((silence again)))) So I say, "so, are you getting more sex now that you have your condo, then you did when you lived with me?"
And he hung up.
Go figure....Just trying to keep the conversation alive.
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That is me laughing out loud!!! You are so darn funny!! As I was reading the beginning of your post I was thinking along those lines too- I would have made it about me though- probably a little more business too- "I have purple chicken pox now..." I have been staying real clear of any personal issues with him - it hurts less to think of his new bandaid and the lack of sex that I now have!!
Great attempt to keep the conversation going though!!
Too bad you don't live closer - I'm sure we could have fun out together- especially after D!!
Then, I say, I took D15 to that musical lay at school and we had a good time." He says, "glad to hear it." ((((silence again)))) So I say, "so, are you getting more sex now that you have your condo, then you did when you lived with me?"
And he hung up.
Go figure....Just trying to keep the conversation alive.
LOL, LOL, LOL. You made my entire weekend with this.
I am posting on MLC now, but expect sadly to be over here eventually. Thanks again for the big chuckle.
Thanks everyone for checking on me. Nothing too new to report. Life just goes on. D15 is off school this week so she has been busy. I have been finishing my financials (yeah, me!) and helping my friend out with her new puppies.
D15 will be 16 on Tuesday. She is waiting to have a birthday party til summer so that she can have it at my friend's house (which is soooo much bigger than our house)and includes a tennis court and swimming pool.
H, trying to be the best Disneyland dad he can, got shot down twice this week. He asked D15 if she wanted to have her party at his condo. She said, "No, mom and friend are handling that."...
So then H asks her if she would like a car for her birthday and she said, "No, I'd really like a digital movie camera". I am so proud of her!!! You see, H informed me that he had made a unilateral decision to get D15 a car. I told him I didn't think it was a good idea, but he said he didn't care WHAT I thought. (What a typical MLC answer, don't you think?) The "MLC teenager" with money trying to buy off the real teenager.
Anyway, since Tuesday is a school day, both H and I are taking her out to dinner. She asked if she could bring one friend (I am sure this is her way of preventing a fight from breaking out between her parents).
I haven't seen H in a couple of weeks and that was only for a few minutes, so I don't know how this will play out. I will do my best to treat him kindly. He is such an alien now. Doesn't know what to do next. He will just have to find his way through the darkness. I can't help him anymore than I have already.
My biggest thrill is coming today! I am having a big storage shed delivered to my driveway. It's 8ft wide by 10 ft. high, by 20 ft. long. It's one of those things that they deliver, you fill it up and then they come and haul it to their storage facility. (like Pods, or Mobile Mimi).
I am NOT having it hauled away, just keeping it in my driveway for a month to completely empty our back rec room.(It's about 500 sq ft.) I have no where else to store the furniture, etc. that is in there while I repaint and recarpet.
I am letting D15 be very involved in choosing the colors, and in selecting the carpeting. We will probably hire someone to do the painting as it will take us forever and we probably wouldn't do a very good job anyway.
So that's all I know for now. Keeping up my PMA and praying a lot. Please know I include all of you in my prayers.
Yesterday was D's birthday - Sweet 16. The celebration was bittersweet.
H picked her up at school and took her to the mall to shop. (Disneyland Dad doing what he does best!)
As I was driving to meet them at a restaurant later in the evening, I made up my mind that this was NOT H's day.....it was D16's day.....so I slapped a happy look on my face, picked up a 10-mylar balloon bouquet and greeted both of them with great enthusiasm.
Everyone in the restaurant was making a fuss over D16, as the balloons created quite an attraction. She put up a bit of a fuss as being embarrassed, but I truly think she appreciated the gesture.
Conversation for the first 10 minutes centered around D's day at school as she told us how her friends had decorated her locker and brought cupcakes and flowers and balloons.
Then silence (It is H's favorite language).
So here I was all happy-faced, excited about being out to dinner, etc., and here is grim-faced H....
In the balloon bouquet were two huge numbers: 1 & 6. But the balloons kept twisting and shifting. When our waitress came over and saw the balloons, she asked who was celebrating a b-day. I told her, "One of us at this table is either 16 or 61....you guess."
Well, she said she could obviously see that it was D and that she was 16. H said, "Well, I FEEL 61." Gotta wonder about that statement, even said in jest.
The remainder of the dinner was pleasant and upbeat. Every time the conversation lagged, I picked it up with a new topic....baseball season, my friends new puppies, our dog, the weather...etc.
When our food came, D and I gobbled up everything on our plates. H just moved his huge salad around and ate about 1/3 of it. When I asked if it was OK, he said he had a big lunch.
D16 and I started talking a bit about her confirmation at church this Saturday and the fact that my folks are arriving in town to stay with us for the weekend to celebrate both the confirmation and birthday Sat. night. We will also invited some neighbors and friends.
I asked H, "Will you be coming on Saturday," and he turned his eyes downward and said in a very small and sad voice, "no." So I said, "Well, you are very welcome to come. I will save you a seat in church." And he said again, "No, I can't." At least he didn't lie and say he was going to be out of town.
So my question to the MLC experts is....would it help, hurt or make no difference to the situation if I sent H an email that said:
Thanks for dinner last night. I enjoyed seeing you. I hope you will reconsider coming on Saturday. No matter what your feelings for me, this is HER night." This is a major milestone in our daughter's life and I am sure she would want you to be there.
So what do you think? Send it, don't send it, reword it? I really could use some guidance on this.
Also, is it significant that H has only seen D16 three times since January and has not had her overnight since that time?
