From my 1st M....after she had known him for 2 months.

"God will forgive me for leaving you because he knows that Joe is my soulmate"

"We didn't have sex until you moved out because we didn't think it was right" oh that's right, it doesn't matter that we're still married!

"I want to have his child but he says he's too concerned about my asthma and wouldn't want to kill me"