This is an oldie but a goodie. My H left me a note on the kitchen table that he needed to get away for a while, that he loved me and loved the kids and wanted to have a family again...we found it when we got back from our spring break trip to visit HIS parents. He was too busy with work to go....No, he went to the Bahamas with OW.
When he got home...he told me all about the trip and how awful it was, the crappy little cabin they stayed in, how much OW drinks, how angry she can get....
They're planning a wedding.
Each experience in life has formed me, become part of me, made me stronger.
Last year, H & I talked about going to the World Cup soccer games in Germany for his birthday. However, H made another plan and is there with OW now. H takes me on a date (dinner, movie, holding hands with me) before he leaves, and tells me all about his plans with OW and says, enthusiastically "Do you want me to bring you a t-shirt?"
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
RB, thank you for bringing this post back. I haven't laughed this hard in a long time.
One scary/duh moment to share: After finding out OW had precancerous cells (she's 25) and that they are often caused by HPV (an STD) he says... what kind of a a-hole has sex with someone and doesn't tell them they may have an STD or that they've had unprotected sex? (Uhh... you?)
Of course I'm thinking... oh God, how long were you sleeping with her before you told me about it. (It's ok, I got tested and came back clean.)
Upon break-up with OW1 (he's now on OW2) he says: Yeah, honey, if you think I have problems, boy does she ever. I was always asking her to talk to me about what was going wrong, that I wanted this relationship to work - but she refused to put in any effort. Turns out she was seeing someone else. How screwed up is she? (Uhh...)
And last but not least, I don't think this will ever work out between us. The trust is gone. When I left you for OW1, you transfered money from our joint account to your personal one because you thought I was going to screw you over. I just can't believe you were thinking of yourself first. I can't trust you at all anymore. Who do you think you are? (Apparently I thought I was you sweetie. Oops, my bad.)
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Me = 28
WAH = 26
M = 7 yrs
D final = mid-Nov '06
When my H first told me about the OW, and I asked what it is they have in common, he said she likes to shop for power tools at Lowe's. Then a week later, he said he was going to get a hotel for a few days so he could read and think and pray. That's when the PA started.
H 40
Me 40
married 15 years
5 children aged 2-11
Bomb 2-6-05
Now we are piecing, I think
All right since I am on the flip side of the coin having been the one in MLC, I am offering this up at my own expense .
It wasn't specifically about the A but I THINK this may have been the stupidest thing I said during my MLC...
H and I were discussing him refinancing the house.
Had we been planning to stay together, the $25,000 that we got would have built an addition onto the house. Since I was adamant we were NOT staying together, I offered an alternative use for the money.
I actually asked him to build me a little apartment in the 1/2 acre beside our house that we own. My rationalization was that he would not have to be separated from the kids and neither would I. That when he worked nights, I'd be right here. The look on his face said it all. I had clearly lost my entire freakin mind. He asked me how he was supposed to deal with OM coming to see me on HIS property.
I actually thought it was a good idea at the time.
Well Amy, I thought that H and I could buy a duplex and actually thought I could handle OW coming and going from there...I don't think he liked the idea
Each experience in life has formed me, become part of me, made me stronger.
Quote: How about, "The last thing I want is a relationship with somebody"
or
(when she is moving out) "I am not going to date anyone. That's the last thing I want. But you can date if it will help you to learn how to connect with people again."
and my favorite
"I need to find out what it is like to live life on my own with nobody else"
Yep, got that one. Right before finding out he moved in with ow. And then kept asking me not to date for at least a year after the divorce so he could make up his mind. Whatever!
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