I have been lurking here for some time now. I suppose there is no reason to post here other than to tell my story to someone who understands and get it off my chest. I am nearly fifty, a HD H and my wife is seven years younger than me and LD/ND. We've been married almost 20 years and have 2 pre-teen kids. Our sex life was good for the first couple of years but slowly started tapering off. After we had our first child 13 years ago is when things really accelerated downhill. We would ML maybe once a month or so, then once every other month, then twice a year until we bottomed out in 2000 when we didn't ML the entire year. I've tried to talk with her about it several times, especially over the last couple of years and usually things will get better for a month or two, but then we slip right back into the same pattern. Even when we do ML she really isn't into it at all. Her goal is to get it over with as soon as possible. My real problem is that I love her a lot. We enjoy each other's company and in every other way she is a perfect match for me. I'm also very sexually attracted to her as well. I've made several attempts over the years trying to romance her, but with no luck. About a year ago I considered leaving, but bought a copy of TSSM and decided against it. I tried to get her to read it but she is dead-set against it, and gets upset if I bring it up. I've pretty much come to the conclusion that things are never going to change. Currently we ML about once every three months. It's very clear even that is just a service to me. It's always unfulfilling and not really all that much fun. In our past discussions she has set the groundwork to keep ML at a minimum. She says she doesn't want to do it during the week because she is too tired from work. She usually goes to bed before the kids do anyway. She says she prefers either Saturday or Sunday morning before the kids wake up. But usually she sleeps in too and gets angry if I try to wake her up. By the time she gets up, has coffee, etc., we are now bordering on the time the kids wake up so we have to do it quick if we are going to do it at all. Most of the time she can sense I'm going to want to ML, and heads it off by being on her period, having a headache, or some other excuse. Most of the time I just drop it because I feel like a heel wanting to ML if she doesn't feel good. The last time we ML, she said she felt she had a "cold coming on" and didn't want to give it to me, so she didn't want to kiss. So we ML without kissing. She is careful not to be alone with me too. If the kids both want to spend the night somewhere, she will try to talk one of them into staying home. I could tell some pretty amusing stories about that, but this is long enough already. And so I've accepted it. My sex life is going to be very infrequent for the rest of my life, and even when we ML it's going to be boring and unfulfilling. Thus the username "Game_Over".
