Kismet, WalkingBack, SohpieL - Thanks for your support fellow Sista Goddesses...One advice that I could give is Do NOT jump into conclusions!!!
Journaling...long post!!
From my last post… everything was going on well on Thursday and Friday (4th/5th May). Calls and texts from H to talk about stuff…. Then Friday evening, I got a call from H and thought that he sounded weird. I sent him a text. Me: U sound weird. R u up to no good? H: No I am not. I am up to partying Me: Ok then… Have fun.
Next thing, got another call from H. Brief convo and he still sounded weird. I didn’t feel at ease at all. Call ended quite quickly. I then thought of something to ask of H, and I sent him a text…. And I couldn’t contact him. The message was pending for a long time. I called him, but could not contact him at all. This time was also the “normal” flight time that H normally takes on his stealth visits back to our home country to see ow, while lying to me that he is still in Country X. So, I jumped to conclusion that he was on his way back to see ow and not even wanting to see the boys (he hasn’t seen boys for about 3 weeks to date). I started crying and thinking all sorts of negatives. Bombarded H with text messages of “lying to me. We are no match to her. Don’t want to play games. Why ask us to go to Country X? Did you really submit school application? Will give you D..blah blah blah” …I turned my mobile off and was on my house phone sobbing to my SIL. H tried to call me but couldn’t and he called my mom on her mobile. I knew about this because my mom called my domestic helper when she couldn’t contact me. Was a lot of ding-dong of phone calls.. When I turned my mobile on, H tried to call and I just ignored them. Then he sent me a text “Can you please answer my calls?” Lots of text messages exchanged between us …didn’t talk to him…so NO shouting matches over the phone. In some of his texts: - I am in some bar with no coverage OK?? - I am in Country X, and not home. This time I am going to say Check my passport! When are you going to believe me? H did finally call the house phone but I didn’t talk to him. S6 spoke to him though. Somehow…I calmed down, he calmed down… and our text messages became more of stuff about other things.
Next day, Saturday…Some text exchanges Me: Sorry that I over-reacted yesterday. Blah blah blah. H: It’s these outburst that p!sses me off!! Blah blah blah Me: Well, if you don’t make any stealth visits back, I would guarantee that the outburst would stop. H: No time for stealth visits. I will give you HR lady’s number. You can contact her directly. I didn’t reply to this…
Anyway, did feel better on Saturday. Went for my Yoga class, took boys to watch MI3 and then to their badminton coaching… Did have a few teleconversations with H.
Sunday.. Was better… Took boys out for brunch with my girlfriend. Shopped a little and then had coffee in the afternoon with another girlfriend. She is the wife of H’s coworker based in our home country. The convo with her is quite “promising” because the first thing she said was “hey…I heard that you are moving to Country X”. …and I guessed H must have told her hubby. Later that evening… did have a short teleconversation with H…
Monday (8th May) Traveled to out-of-town office for work. Will be here for the next few weeks. Had some text exchanges with H in the afternoon. Said that he can’t come back home for the next few weeks due to work load and renewal of his passport etc etc. Told him it’s okay…and asked if he could come back for the Treasure Hunt at the end of the month. He said won’t be a problem blah blah blah…. Later that night.. tele-con and text exchanges and had phone s@x before bed.
Tuesday (9th May) Quite a good day… had text exchanges with H about the Treasure Hunt, me taking the boys over to Country X in early June etc. He also called me to talk to me… One thing that H said is that he is applying for a position in our home country. It’s a higher position… I can’t help but wonder…”will he continue to see ow if he works back in our home country?” Anyway, I did ask “should I tell the teachers and my boss then?’ H replied “no no no. Do according to plan to move here. This job is a long shot.”…. It would be good for H career-wise and we don’t have to move to Country X…but I feel uncomfortable for H to move back home when our M is still not really fixed, and access to ow is easy. … Won’t know outcome of the local job till about 2 weeks later…. But then…this is not within my control…. Will leave it to Almighty God to decide our fate…
Anyway, we had some humorous text exchanges in the afternoon… also asked if I could fly over to Country X for s@x this weekend…Unfortunately, can’t…got to work...and then later in the evening H called me but my phone ran out of battery. SO didn’t talk at all… when I got back to the hotel, I sent him a short text…then H called and he was with an old coworker whom I knew too…so he passed the phone to me. Had a short chat with this friend and then back to H.
I was having dinner with my coworkers, and received more texts from H. We exchanged some texts and H called. We chatted, laughed and giggled. Walked back to the hotel…more text exchanges, and we had phone s@x again…
Today, Wednesday No contact from H yet… but then, I was away from my mobile…so don’t know and haven’t check my phone yet….
So far, I have not really “asked” if ow is still in the picture…. And because it has not been asked again, it has not been brought up by H. So, I really don’t know if she still is. But H has been calling me more often, and we have had more contacts. Still planning to move to Country X in a few months. H says he will join in the Treasure Hunt end of the month… We are making plans to visit Country Xtogether with MIL in early June for a few days…
I don’t know… am I actually piecing with my H? Or am I in some la-la land too??
