KDK - H says he has ended with ow...but I don't know... He kept on saying that we will work on US once we move over.
Leslie - I have lived away from home before... so, not that afraid about the move... BeingMe – Thanks for your concern in my decision to move. But at this point in time, don’t think that I could say NO to the move. I know H has not been a trustworthy person. But think that I need to do this more for ME. As I mentioned, I would not be able to be truly satisfied that I have DONE all I can if I refused to move and my M falls apart. On the other hand, if my M still fails after the move, I can at least tell myself that I have done all I can and did my best to preserve my M. Of course it would be a bonus if my M is preserved and is saved with the move. But I wouldn’t know if I don’t try. As my mentor says “If each time you travel, you are certain that the plane is going to crash, you will never ever go up on the plane. Would you?” Everything in life comes with some level of risks, I guessed. The move though sounds scary is not all that scary. It’s not the first time that I have moved to a foreign country nor the first time I have given up my job. I have done it before we moved back to our home country 4 years ago…. The only difference now is that H is NOT the perfect H that I thought he was. I think the thing about moving that scares me abit is the financial reliance on H. But H generally is rather generous…. So, think it would be okay (fingers crossed…) 
Journalling… From my last post: I flew to Country X again on Saturday (29th) and stayed on till Monday (1st May). H called me up and told me that he wanted me to visit the other international school on Monday. So I went. Went on my own….boys did not come along. This time round…told myself that I would not fight or argue with H. Overall, this trip was quite pleasant. Arrived on Saturday, early afternoon. H came to pick me up with the driver. We went to the supermarket to get some groceries and then home… Hung out at home, had s@x and watched some TV together… Cooked dinner and ate at home. H cleaned-up…So, was kinda nice. I am sure he did “retreat” into his shell when he went out for his smokes…but I didn’t ask him nor query him. Didn’t jump on him…just let him be. He seemed “normal” when he joins me back.
Next morning (Sunday)… Went out to an “Electric City”… H wanted to get some speaker stands… but as usual, looked at TVs and stuff. H did make comments like “we need a computer for the house, right?”…..and that “Oh…we need to get the company to include curtains in the new house. It would be quite a lot of money if we were to pay for it ourselves”.
We then went to the mall, we had lunch together..and watched a movie together “The Sentinel”… and then he went for a haircut, and I went off for a hairwash… Went home…watched more TV together… and then went out to a Turkish Restaurant together.. Donned by plunging neckline dress and H was a little surprised.  Had a little too much to drink… and we did touch on ow… but nothing too heavy…. One thing he did say “for the sake of discussion…what would you want for a D?” I answered “X dollars. All in”. And H said “Wow!! That’s more than half”… We talked about other stuff cause I said “okay, don’t want to fight”…. When we got home, I said something like “touch them. It’s real stuff. Unlike your that one. Fake stuff!!” (I was referring to my pair of bo@bs) and H said “what fake stuff? She has no stuff!!” I laughed and said “that’s quite funny…”. Anyway, didn’t stay up long…I was quite zonked out… 
Next morning.. Monday… H set off for work. I was to go to see the school and then meet H for lunch. But there was some major event in town, and H called later to suggest that I shouldn’t come into town as I might get stuck in a jam… So, didn’t see H before I left for home. Anyway, went to see the school, and then went to the spa before I left for the airport.
Tuesday (2nd May) H said that he already submitted all the relevant documents to his company’s HR dept to process the boys’ application to the International School. And I am to liase directly with the HR lady on the status. Told my boss that I would be leaving the company. Timing wise, would depend on the boys’ schooling. Told H that I’ve informed my boss and the first thing he asked is If I could get a job in Country X…No drama today… spoke to H abit before bed (he called)…and did ask him if we would be okay with me NOT having a job…he texted back “Don’t worry. Will be OK”.
Wednesday… Left my mobile at home…so no contact with H the whole day. He did call in the evening. Talked to boys and I did talk to him a bit… he asked me if I showed the school’s brochure to the boys and I told him that I did, and S 81/2 is already choosing his after-school activities. Another quiet day…
