Quote: However, I am needy and I have to stop that. The best way to do that is to back off and detach. I'll play it by ear tonite when I get home and see what's up but I expect her to be distant.
And she didn't let me down. She was drinking a glass of wine when I got home, which means something is depressing her. She talked to me at dinner, but really only about her having lunch with her Dad today.
She said he of course asked how 'we' are doing since he doesn't understand HOW we can live together under the 'divorce' situation. And I think he told her to 'fix her marriage'.
I guess he belittled her giving him the book 'The Four Agreements', saying it was just more spirituality 'crap'. That kind of stuff really hurts her because it's insulting.
In general she said she told him a lot less about what she's thinking or doing because he "doesn't get it".
Tonite she seems like she's feeling sad, and wants to reach out to me, but won't. No hugs, no kisses, nothing. Barely a smile or two. Keeping her distance so she won't become 'dependent' on me I guess. Last week she almost couldn't keep her hands off me. Now she's far away.
D15 is not feeling well so in a rare expression of neediness she is sitting with W watching TV while W massages her feet. It's good that they spend the quality time, you don't get that very often with a teenager.
It's almost 10 pm so I probably won't get a chance to talk to her, or offer her some foot rubs or head rubs that she likes. This sucks. Once again I built up hopes and expectations. This is not a good thing to do.
I guess we got too close too fast. She seemed like she really wanted it, but then decided it was too much and she has to get divorced or she will become dependent on me. Something happened this past weekend with her friend, or she had too much time to think about her life and how she believes she is becoming 'needy' and has to have me around to 'fill her cup'. That scares her.
Matbe she'll change her mind in a few days. She's still smiling, so that means she hasn't 'checked out' completely.
