Quote: Frank, your marriage is on the road to recovery. I think you could feel comfortable moving over to Piecing now, I'm that sure of it. I felt that about you from the first time you posted. You were so sincere in your DBing and your love was so deep that I knew you'd do this. Your "calm and collectedness" continues to amaze me and it is a matter of time until your W recommits.
Thanks Becca. I really appreciate your kind words.
I'm going to stay cautious for now. I still haven't gotten past the hurt of OM and to be truthful, as I get stronger in my own 'self' I'm not so sure I know what I want to do with her just yet. I think that she believes she needs to keep her 'independence', out of fear if nothing else.
I don't feel like I was 'calm and collected', but crazy out of control most of the time. I guess around HER I was as stable as possible while it was tearing me up. Sometimes I don't know how I made it this far, especially during the holidays. I think what has helped me MOST is the people on this board who took an interest in supporting me. I know I've been a little quiet on others threads the past few weeks but, as I said, last couple weeks were so hard and my cup was EMPTY as W used it all up.
I said some really poorly thought out things a couple weeks ago to 'totallymessedup' and realized that I could no longer help anyone else because I had nothing left to give and wasn't thinking straight. So I've been focusing on myself since then.
Now, I'm recharged and I feel much more empowered. So I'll start returning the kindness again.
I think W is using me right now to heal her emotional wounds from OM and there is no way I will allow she or I to fall into any kind of 'dependence' on each other. It didn't work before and it won't work now.
Sure, it sounds good on paper, but me actually doing this will be a real challenge. It's still a tough situation but there is one thing you are dead right on, my love for her is very very deep.
