I got to thinking about it on the way home... since I was dreading seeing her and dealing with it all.
I started thinking - gosh, things were fine a few days ago... what the heck started all this?
then I remembered. It was because I initiated sex. I asked her for sex. That was it. She started into me the next morning with how offensive I had been. I remember my confusion. How was I offensive? It's not like I was crass or said something like "you better put out now" - I went in there and said I really wanted to be with her tonight. So, how was it offensive. As she describes it, it was "offensive" because I have been ignoring her and now I expect her to jump from level 1 to level 10 instantly.
so, on my drive home I was thinking about this and I think I know what is going on now. I think this is really more about HER than she cares to admit. There have been just as many times in the last month that she has turned me down for lunch or dinner (because of HER busy schedule) as I have done to her. We have gone out. We have spent time together. I think the TRUTH of the matter is that after I asked for sex, she laid there in bed asking herself WHY she didn't want to. Probably paranoid that I was pissed off or something. So, she started telling herself..."well, if he had done this or that I would have responded differently" - in this way, she could place the blame on ME instead of her. That way, she could say that the reason we did not have sex was because *I* did not do something.
well, I got home and instead of the normal excited HI and a smile I just got a glance as she was talking to one of our kids. Then, as I returned from the bathroom she was heading out the door to drop D14 off for dance - "bye, gotta run" - not even a kiss or a moment to look each other in the eyes and say HI. Yep, she's definately stewing over this. I guess she'll return in a few minutes and I'll see where she takes this.
